Ever notice how it's the little things in life that amuse us so much? More to the point, ever notice how it's the silly little idiocies in life that amuse us more than anything else? Well, this is not as much ''the little blog that could'' as it is ''the blog that enjoys going up the down escalator in your local mall.'' Will it have anything of real importance? No, probably not. But enjoy the ride never the less!

 


Tonight, Mel was poking at my chest in a playful manner...and managed to completely lose track of my nipples. Not one, but both nipples. She quite obviously started jabbing at random places in an attempt to find either nipple, but still ended up missing them both by easily an inch. If this were foreplay, she'd have failed at it. Instead, there was just plain fail.

But now I am off to bed, and she is still attempting to slug through some really really reeeaaally bad Sailormoon fanfics featuring the Senshi/General pairings. You know how it goes: the trainwreck is so bad, you cannot look away for fear of what horribly hilarious thing you might miss next. Consider the actually happened conversation Mel and I had when she had me take a look at this fic:


Me, Myself and I : "Okay, so Minako...'was still very worried that Kunzite was listening to Metallica.' What the hey?"

Mel: "No, he was listening to Metallia."

Me: "Oh...I like my version better. It actually improves the story."

Mel: [sigh!] "Sadly, yes, it does."


Although here's a quick, handy tip to any aspiring writer (or lover) out there: if you ever attempt to stick one, let alone up to four, fingers into a woman's clitoris, the end result will be tears, internal hemorrhaging and the retribution of having every bone in your arm shattered by the aforementioned woman.

Now that is truly failing at foreplay. And basic human anatomy.

Labels: Exit Light Enter Really Bad Lemon Scene, spectacular nipple failure (and not just in the fic either)

posted by Phillip at 4:39 AM